Hospital lacking Hospitality

      Well folks it's been awhile since my last entry, and a rant is over due. This is another personal rant that has to do with my granny's health and a hospital that needs to go back to schooling.

As always everything remains anonymous for safety and privacy reasons.
 
A lot has happened lately concerning my granny's health so let me begin with the beginning. A few months ago, probably around October, she was having severe back pain that resulted for an ambulance to be called on multiple occasions but the doctors only gave her medicine for the pain, until it kept continuing where they had to hospitalize her with a diagosis of something concerning her vertabrae in her back is not alighned. So she was put on bed rest and kept going back-and-forth between deciding if she needed surgery or not. They finally made a decision of no surgery due to her age. It was weeks of them "deciding" this and sending her back and forth between Carilion hospitals. Then they decide to put her in a rehab-nursery home to help with her back since she would need constant care.

    I won't go into much detail about how certain members of my family reacted since that's a different rant, but about four of us (counting myself) thought her staying at a nursery was a good idea. However, my granny was devastated. I understand she would rather be home, but she's not going to get better at home since she doesn't have constant care as a hospital-type of place. That being said leads us to her ONLY staying not even a month at the nursery home after some nurses made her feel nervous about not helping her at night. So back home she comes which lasts only a few days before she's back in an ambulance again. This time the hospital finds sores and ulcers on her back from where she was laying completely on her back for so long after she stayed home those days. They put her in a different nursery home this time where she stayed a month but her health started dropping due to not eating and her mental state was in depression. Again rushed back to the ER for her dropping of health.

    So a few weeks ago we get the horrid news and a new diagnosis of a kidney disease type three, where the doctor didn't even tell us! My aunt had to call him just to learn about what he diagnosed my granny with! Don't doctors supposed to tell you this kind of stuff? Apparently he must've forgot since we learned from a nurse instead of him. Well we go on trying to improve my granny's mental state and begging her to eat. She was literally so depressed that she had no appetite to eat. Then my aunt had a good idea for the doctor to give my granny some kind of appetite inducer so she can eat, but he refused it! He then diagnosed her for the THIRD time where they found a blood disease and literally told my family bluntly "If she lives through this she will only have six months to live." NO compassion whatsoever in his voice, not even a sorry for the trouble we will go through, NOTHING! What happened to doctors helping their patiants? I understand about being realistic but you don't have to be an asshole about it. IF you're going to give devastating news least be compassionate about it! But no, it was like he was telling there's no more pie but without the "i'm sorry". It was nothing to him but another client.

    Well we tried holding ourselves together and keep hopeful as we visited my granny and try to continue getting her to eat and break her out of her morbid state. A few days later she starts improving and eating. Finally! However, from her medicine and something the hospital did made my granny spooked where she speaks about a "death room" and how the doctors were "counting down the moment of her death" one night. They really scared her, and we believe some of her story is a result of the meds she's on since one of the side affects is confusion and dillusions. I do believe my granny, but when she calls home at 11pm yelling at my mom to "bring my wheelchair!" because she's "heading there! Heading home!" and repeating over and over about her wheelchair. But, all is getting better now.

    This week she's scheduled to be transferred over to another, a better, nursery home named Trinity, which she will be arriving soon this week. She's eating better and her mood is becoming more positive, as well as her health. But this rant isn't over yet, because one "head" nurse does something to piss us off. A few days ago a group of people headed into my granny's room to talk about her health, and one person was this "head nurse" who wasn't even scheduled at all to be on my granny's floor. The nurse had nothing to do with my granny at all, but this lady decides to put her opinion into the mess. She clearly states that my granny isn't going to make it since she's been in the hospital for the third time now, and how bad a place Trinity is since all "nursery centers are the same". Well my aunt calls this nurse out on her stupid opinion and shuts her up making her leave the room. Oh but doesn't end there. That bitch waits for my aunt to leave to head on home (which is like few hours later) then enters my granny's room to tell her about "making a plan" when my granny dies. What kind of person does that?!

    First off, that nurse has no orders whatsoever to be in my granny's room, and nonetheless to tell her opinions to us. We are aware of granny's health, we dont' need you to remind us that she's going to die someday. Someday but not today! Secondly, that's very immature and rude to wait until my granny was alone to tell her something like that and get her to make a "plan". A plan like that is between family members, not random strangers! My granny needs positive support, not some random nurse telling her she's going to die. I could care less about how many years you worked at the hospital or that you are the "head" nurse, you are a lousy nurse and a bitch if you tell an 80-year old woman she's going to die without any hope. Fucking do your job healing her! And not to mention you are not even one of the nurses that takes care of her so get away from my granny! We swear if she continues we will contact the hospital for harassment. This is the worse hospital for poor hospitality. "hospitality" a word that comes from hospitals, doesn't it not? Ironic since this hospital is the worse when it comes from that! They took three times to diagnose over a three month span, and two failed nursery homes, and bunch of doctors who live in different cities, and a bitch of a nurse. If that nurse continues, we will file harassment on her to stop her. She has no right to bother a patient that doesn't concern her.

    But, thankfully, she has a better doctor then those idiots, that pulls her spirits up and knows what he's doing. And this week she's being moved to Trinity where I heard it's a good place. Most importantly her health is improving, even slightly, it's improving, and her mental health is getting better despite that bitch nurse. I know one day I will my granny, but right now she's here and I'm going to hope with all my heart she will remain with us much longer than that "diagnoses" of her dying in 6 months. Miracles happen, and I'm just happy my granny is improving. Though I do ask everyone who reads this to keep her in your thoughts or prayers to continue getting better. I love my granny so much.

Hypocrites that complain.

Long time no rant! Well folks, it's rant time again. The topic today is people who have to complain about every single thing that doesn't even concern them and how hypocritical they can be.

Everything posted in my blog is completely anonymous for privacy and safety reasons. If you assume this is about you please provide proof, or go on your merry way.

I always get a laugh when I hear someone complaining all the time about people that don't even concern them. Shall i do an example? Well there's this person who absolutely hate gyms and finds it sickening that furries like him/herself goes to gyms to look like their furries. It's "not right" to this person because characters shouldn't have the same body style as the person they are based upon, since the two worlds should be different. This person hates when furries go to gyms to look like thier fursonas. Why does this person care so much about other people's lives? It's their life and they aren't harming you, so why care? Then the person complains about quitting because they're isn't any "originality" anymore in the fandom. Again, who cares? If the people aren't harming you with their life, then get over it. Not to mention, this person is obsessed with thier own weight in the past before, so why does he/she get so obsessed with other people's weight? And don't deny the jealousy, because only a jealous person would constantly complain and moan about a stranger's life because they wish to look like their character in real life. I don't understand people like that. There's a difference to have the right to complain, than just complaining because you have nothing else to do. Seriously? I get a hoot out of people who are so obsessed and block people over stupid things such as a lifestyle other's have that doesn't even affect you in any way or form.

Then whining about wanting to quit something you enjoy just because you don't like other artists' stuff? Who does that? Why quit something you love just because you don't like other artists? If you quit something then you aren't a real fan of it. A real artists or furry or any fandom you are into, does NOT quit something they love just because they see things other artists draw. They are allowed to draw what they want, and you are allowed to draw what you want. No one is forcing you to draw what they draw, and for you to quit something just because of other artists, it makes you seem fake, and only doing it for fame than love. Who cares what is mainstream or not? If you love something you never give up on it. And if you don't like it, simply ignore it. There are many things I despise that is everywhere i go, but I just ignore it. Now and again it's alright to complain some, but to be totally obsessed and swear to quit over it? That's just stupid in my opinion.

And what makes me laugh the hardest about all of this? Is when the person who's complaining does the same things, but makes up excuses to not look like a hypocrite. How is this person being a hypocrite, you ask? The first complaint was him/her saying it " pisses me off when artists on here an other sites bitch and moan about having their art stolen or used elsewhere, it's their own stupidity an the reason it happens in the first place." Well this person does the same thing about posting his/her art on different sites, and he/she even complained MANY times about people stealing his/her ideas. People are allowed to complain if someone is using their original work, and it's bit hypocritical to complain about them when you complained too about people stealing your stuff. The second complaint is "I base my fursona off my emotions, feelings, and the different aspects of what makes me, ME. I'm fat, chubby and sure it pisses me off but I deal with it, I have yet to create a fursona that is based on the physicality of what makes me, me." Actually this person has made one fursona based of him/her, and in the past tried his/her hardest to lose weight by taking pills and such. And in my personal opinion, he/she is NOT fat. Just because you arne't skinny doesn't mean you are fat. Stop giving into society and start thinking with common sense. And again, who cares what other people do? It's their life, not yours, so live yours and forget everyone else's life.

Hypocrites, what will you do with them? I just laugh and rant. I can't stand hypocrites because they are so egotistic and cowardly, they can't admit they aren't perfect or they are wrong. I could care less if someone complains about something rational (i do it all the time), but when someone complains about irrational stuff just irks me. What's so bad about a person wanting to look like their own character? They aren't harming anyone. What's so bad about going to the gym to get the body you want? They aren't pushing you to do the same, and not judging you, so why judge them? Why leave something you love just because you are "surrounded" by stuff you dislike? Put it on your ignore list and continue doing it. A person is fake and a coward in my book if they quit something they love doing based on lives of strangers they never even interacted with. And you are jealous if you complain about something so much that it becomes an obsession over something that doesn't even concern you. These are strangers' lives, you never even met, that is doing no harm to anyone! Get over it and stop whining all the time about them.

Well I'll end the rant there since I will be on repeat. I'm sure y'all get the point; Hypocrites complaining about other people's lives when it doesn't even concern them. As I said before, if the person wasn't being hypocritical, I wouldn't even care to rant, but when you're going to be a hypocrite then you deserve to be ranted about. Well anonymously of course.

Only in Memories can time stand still...

Well folks, it's been awhile since my last entry, and sorry to say this one won't be a rant either but a "lets talk about my feelings" type. So if you wish to not read this one then you may skip it, but I need to talk and it's my blog so I'm going to post in it regardless of who reads it. And yes, like always, my posts are long so be prepared to read. "Only in memories can stand stand still, but life in a memory wouldn't be real." (from a poem of mine)

As normal everything remains anonymous due to safety and privacy reasons.

What is the meaning of friendship? A simple question that is easy to answer, but if it's so easy then why is it so hard to have? I wrote many blogs in the past to what friendship means to me, but apparently this year I realized my meaning is different than others. Friendship is a two-way street where you both give and receive from each other. You care for one another and when in arguments you try to work it out. But sadly, some people would rather end the friendship than talking it out afterwards simply because they think you are not worth the friendship. It's all about what they want, instead of the good things you did for them in the past. I am a loyal person so when I have a friend I will do whatever i can to keep that friendship, even if it means I get hurt since the other person doesn't share the same meaning of friendship that i do.

As everyone knows from my last entries there is a person that I lost as a friend because this person doesn't have the same meaning of friendship as i did, so the person literally blocked me out of their life without even a "goodbye". Now, I did contact this person afterwards (gave it a day or three before I did) telling the person an apology for making the person angry, I wished the person happiness, and I promised to stay out of their life along with a goodbye. I gave it another few days (no response) before I blocked the person thinking it was for the best. I have no clue if the person read my message or not, but the person did tell lies to others regarding our fight a day later. This person also complained to another about how annoying I am to them and more lies regarding things I supposedly done in the past (which I looked up on and there is no proof those accusations the person said are even true. I talked to the two people the person mentioned where they informed me it was false).

Why don't I move on? Simply because I value friendship too much and it really hurts when someone that I care for does that to me. This person I knew for years, and I valued this person as a close friend of mine. Yes, we had major drama three years ago, and apparently we're still having arguments over simple things that could be worked out if we talked things out. But, the problem is, I don't get the chance to talk because the person blocks me and ignores me like the plague. Why don't I try to talk? Well first off I'm blocked and secondly, I'm afraid of what the person will say. This person seems to speak angrily to me a lot so I don't want to cause trouble by trying to contact this person, and like before, the person may just ignore my message then tell others opposite of what I said. So simply I don't want to make the person think I'm starting something when I just wish to talk things out.

Why do you want to be friends with a person who doesn't want to friends with you? That's the thing that confuses even myself. I miss the old friend that I once had so I believe if I did my best at being a good friend then maybe I will get that friend back, but so far all I ever do is make this person even more angry with me, and so far others even say this person is not worth being friends with since all the person does is complain and block people out of his/her life. I do agree this person has become mean and selfish at times, but still there is part of me that misses the old person that was a sweet and kind person. I guess it's wishful thinking that the person I used to know is somewhere hidden behind the monster that lashes out at everyone. But it pains me very much to say I can't be friends with someone who treats others poorly, so until this person apologizes for the way the person treated me and others, then I can't pull myself to be friends with the person again. Cause if I do accept another friendship then the cycle won't end; the person gets angry at something simple, yells and  blocks me, ignores me for awhile then adds me back. All that is is pain for both sides. What kind of friendship is that?

Then what's the problem? The problem is I'm confused. I know I should stay away from this person and move on with my life. But I miss the person, and there are words inside of me I really wish to tell the person. I still want to apologize for our bad past, and tell the person I'm sorry for acting the way I did, and to say I'm not angry at the person for what happened two to three years ago. I don't want the person to be so angry with me anymore over the stupidest things, and for the person to come talk to me calmly about what is bothering him/her instead of permantly putting me on the enemy list every time an argument happens. I feel like a coward because I'm so scared to say "I'm sorry for the past, can't we just talk things out?" and make things right between us, but the person has so much rage that I'm afraid the person will only yell at me and tell me how much a bad person I am simply because he/she hates it when I "get into his business". I know I always comment on my friends things, but that just shows that I care and want to help. I only want to help and be a good friend, so I comment positive things to express that I am there for anyone when they need me. I don't like seeing my friends upset or going through troublesome times, so I comment positive things such as "I hope things get better!". And I don't give unwanted advice, so there is no reason to complain about that when it's untrue. Also I really don't know where this person is getting that I'm getting involved in their life when the person is posting it all online for everyone to see, so how am I getting involved when others are commenting too? Don't friends comment on each other things?

There you have it. My feelings. The first time ever in my blogs, I would like advice to handle this emotional state I am in. I'm already decided not to contact this person since I did apologize (regardless if the person read it or deleted it) so the ball is in the other court, it's up to the person to contact me. I unblocked the person on all but one site (I'm going to wait until the person unblocks me on another site until I unblock. it's only fair), and I'm keeping my distance. Now, if the person decides to be my friend again, my logical side is telling me I should refuse unless the person apologizes, but my emotional side wants to have my friend back. If, that's a huge IF there, the person contacts me, what do I do? I know I will react calmly, but I worry that we'll never patch things up again. I really fear the friendship I tried my hardest to hold on to is permentally gone. I can't trust this person again if there is no apology, and I'm afraid to speak to this person due to the anger he/she holds inside his/her heart. And those that know this person has said he/she is a VERY angry person to where they even ignore him/her because of it.

Friendship to me is caring for each other's feelings, respecting each other's opinions even if we don't agree, and never making another person an enemy over a simple argument. I would never tell a friend their opinion is "worthless" or block them from my life over an argument. That's not how friends should act. It doesn't matter how long it was until y'all have seen each other, or if you talk every single day, it's about caring for each other regardless of that. You'd think if this person has lost least three friendships within the last few months, that the problem is they lack the meaning of friendship, but instead the person blames the friends that he/she threw away in the first place. And the sad thing is, I still care for this person and want to make him/her happy... I do wish he/she will come back to reality and face the truth about how badly he/she is treating others. But I doubt that will happen any time soon. So why do I still hope? Why do I watch from afar? I am so confused to what I want that I depress myself. This person is like poison to me that I can't get out of my head. He/She was someone I cared for, want to protect, and make happy, but the friend I thought he/she was doesn't seem to think the same way about me since I was just tossed away. I'm sorry for the past, can't we just talk things out? I want my old friend back...but I'll never forgive the monster the person has turned into.

Ok, that's it. sharing my feelings is over. Any advice to how to move on will be helpful, but I know there is no one that can help me since I'm already doing what any advice that can be given. The ball is in my lost friend's court now, it's up to him/her to make the next action if he/she wishes to apologize and be my friend again. Because like it or not, I am a loyal friend because I respect each other's views, I share my love, and I would do most anything to see people smile. How does that make me annoying? I do have a question for the person though; If you could change our past, would you and what would you done differently? I know I wish to fix the things I did, but do you? Do you regret anything? Do you even miss me...

The Missing Peices of the Haunting Puzzle

I love the feeling of coming out of the thick fog of confusion. I'm not confused anymore, and I think I can move on from the person who pained me the most. I feel relieved, as a weight been taken off my shoulders where there is no ache in my heart. I believe i can move on. I found the missing piece to this dark puzzle that's been haunting me for years.

No names are named for privacy and safety reasons.

Why did it haunt me? Imagine this, there is this person that is very kind and you bond closely with. You and him are much alike in personality so you bond easily, and you feel safe. You like him, he likes you, and you two get together where you are invited into his world. Then it all becomes shattered as you learn his secrets he hid from you, and though you are in pain you want to mend the friendship but every time you try, you fail. Through the years you continue trying to be friends, but he becomes angry at you, and even more angrier the harder you try to be friends. Why is he so angry at you? Yes, the breakup was bad, but could that hold so much hatred? Then several times he throws you away, bashing your name making you the bad person that started all the arguments that happened between you two. You were the one to be blamed. Why? Another year passes but the anger is still there and it's the final straw. He banishes you again, ripping you from his life, and making you his enemy. He wants nothing to do with you and claims you are always "sticking your nose in where you don't belong". Where did this anger come from? Why is it only you who he singles out the most? The question is Why? He turned on others too, but it's you who he hates the most. why? Why did the guy I felt so close to hate me so much when all I ever wanted was to make him happy?

Solid theories were placed to answer those questions, but a puzzle can't be solved if there is missing pieces. And nothing is comlete without the very beginning. Thanks to a friend, that piece was given to me, as well as other pieces. His hatred began here:

He grew up in a home with a family that gave him a tough time where he had insecurities about himself. Parents that expected much from him, like most stress from parents to their children, he tried to please but with a younger sister who manipulated them on her side, it was hard to do. The sister is the biggest reason for his anger, for she destroyed whatever innocence he tried holding close. She was his darkness where his anger grew towards the world. Then a trip to the therapist/psychologist he was told there may be something mentally wrong with him, and years he was taking pills for his depression.

Then, he meets me, where we became friends. Somewhere after years in high school together, he confided in our friend, that I was frustrating to be around due to my positive front made him feel belittled, and my constant butting in his problems made him feel like a moron. That's where it began for me. That one thing was the starting point for his frustration towards me. Time passed, his sister often draining him as she often did to those around her. Why was I her friend? that's another story, but I was afraid of her to put it simply. I was always positive because I hid my negativity to make others happy. I helped other people with their problems so they can be happy. I only wanted to make others happy. I would've done anything for my friends to be happy.

Then he and I began to date once we learned we liked each other. It lasted six months before we had to breakup. He was gay. I assume he was confused to what he should do, felt guilt for hurting me, and was scared about coming out of the closet. Confided in our friend agian, he claimed he felt guilty and felt like a monster for hurting me, and he often hated himself, but looking at me he saw himself within me so he often pushed people away because of that. Then he and his sister fought again, everyone seemed to be turning agianst him, taking my side when he started lashing out at me over something small where he claimed I was "butting in" again. I never told anyone to take my side, I was giving him space but my friends took it in their interest to defend me. He probably felt abandoned and the anger turned to rage.

 Again, he confides in the friend, saying  "Katherine can be so annoying...she is just annoying and likes to shove her nose in business where it don't belong like my family she shouldn't be concerned with them she seems to not notice me at all when she is here. my sister and her always ran off talking by themselves and my mom would call me worthless and a failure and it was like she ignored it she didnt' defend me. She pokes her nose in my family business and helps my mom and sister and everyone else but doesn't defend me. On top of that she lies to them she told me she hates my sister but acts like her best friend and same with my mom!" His rage grows, but never told me this. When I visited, he rarely was home, and when he was he often shut himself away. His sister was my friend even though I didnt' trust her. I was afraid of being her enemy because I was too weak to even defend myself, but it pained me to see her treat him so badly. I will always regret not defending him. But i never lied. I stayed loyal to all my friends, regardless if I feared them or not. I was scared of her, but I didn't hate her. I helped with their problems because I care and want to see others happy. They treated me like I was part of the family, so shouldn't I be concerned with them? I never knew his mother told him that. Another reason his rage grew because I was too weak to defend him against his family, and I kept getting involved in his life when it seems he never wanted me to be part of it in teh first place. A double dose of anger.

Then, he got into other arguments with me, over stupid things, where he didn't like me expressing my emotions about our breakup. It led to him lashing out again at me, and his anger grew even more. confiding more in the friend, he said he wanted me to fight for him and showed that i cared for him. He wondered if I cared since I didn't fight for him regarding our relationship. If he's gay, then there is no way we can be together. It's not fair to him if I fought for us to stay together, and I was trying to overcome the sadness I felt for learning the secret where I was the last to know. I did care, I was hurt but I never stopped caring. To this day i still care.

Months passed, we don't talk, and I get in a relationship with another dear friend of ours who later becomes my fiance' now. Oddily, our friend said that he was "mourning" our breakup before the friend mentioned I was dating that guy. He gets mad saying "I know, and I don't care. She's his problem now, and he's making a mistake. He can deal with her." Why did he say this? Because the guy was his first crush and apperently he still is crushing over. In arguements, he brings my fiance's name into it saying my fiance is on his side. And often thinks highly of him even though at this time he is already involved in another guy. Why would he care who i dated if he was already in a relationship? Not to mention, fast forward to now, he keeps spreading lies that my fiance' is pissed off with me for "sticking my nose in where it doesn't belong" to everyone who hears, which is a complete lie. Another reason his anger grows, I'm involved with one of his crushes.

it doesn't end there. Years of lies told to him by his sister about words I had said. My friendship with his sister is the biggest resentment, and at this time I stayed loyal to both of them. If a friend doesn't do something to me, I refuse to turn on them, but I try to keep the peace. i cannot mend the hatred between the siblings, but I cared for both even though my trust failed for both of them. I still regret not defending him from his sister, she is a manipulative bitch, but the strange thing is he often takes her side when he's mad with me. Weird, huh? I was friends (I was her friend, which is a different story) with his sister so that's another reason he hates me.

The rage inside of him is hatred now. And the final theory to why he hates me, is maybe, just maybe, he doesn't trust women, and is a sexist. He is gay, so his interest is men. So why wouldn't he have problem with the female gender if he has trusts issues? This is the reason to why he probably never told me his feelings, and tried communicating to me about our feelings. Instead he confided in a male friend. Then there's me, the girl who is trying to help him, but with the rage already inside of him and his distrust of women, he sees me as a horrible person.

And there you have it, all the reasons that complete the puzzle starting with the very first seed of frustration that grew from other factors, and ended with a theory to why he never (and i mean never) opened up to me about his feelings towards me. The only time he ever told me things was when he was angry that often was bashing me, or twisting the truth to others for sympathy. The mystery of why he changed his personality, that will never be solved, but the puzzle to why he hates me has came to end. It was never something that I did, it was who I was that he couldn't stand. I was someone who was positive, cheerful, and went out of my way to help others. He just didnt' like that about me, and felt bad about himself that he projected his negative faults onto me, finding things to make me the horrible person. It was "frustrating" to him that i could be positive and that seed inside just grew when I tried my hardest to stay by his side. You can't  help those who wish your destruction, and you can't be friends with someone who hates you. I know we'll never be friends again, but I'm glad I know the reason why. I will always cherish the memories I do have, and finally close this chapter that haunted me for years. I am me, and it's not my fault if you can't handle my kindness, and refuse to see the monster you become due to your hatred..

My Final Good-Bye

This is entry is different than my past posts. It is NOT a rant, but more of a letter to a person (that will remain anonymous). There is a slim chance the person will even read this, and if the person did I doubt it will make a difference between us, but it needs to be said. The communication between us was always missing, and if we had that communication where we were on the same page, things may have been different between us. Also, like normal, all my blogs are long, so please be prepared to read a lot.

As usual no names are told in my blog, it is all anonymous for privacy and safety reasons.

Where do I even start? Before I go back to memory lane, I guess I will first ask the questions that will forever haunt me. What went wrong between us that harmed our friendship? What did I do wrong for you to be so angry with me? And the biggest question of them all is, do you hate me? If you do, why do you hate me? I'm haunted by these questions, but I recently learned some info from a friend that has shed some light on the answers. I'm sorry the friend told me what you promised not to tell years ago, but I had the right to know and to understand what went wrong. There were times, and still some today, that I continue to blame myself thinking i caused your hatred and anger. Even with the info I recieved, It still doesnt' tell me what's going through your mind right now, and I fear I will never get the answers.

The info I recieved was a quote where you spoke to the friend in the past (around 4 years ago or more). You told him, "I don't want to talk about her much, I just want to leave that in the past. Don't say anything please but I am a monster. I left her confused and wanting to try something I fantasized about. I do care about her but I crushed her... It is my fault we split up. I wanted her to fight a little more than she did too, but she let me go like she didn't even care and it fristrates me. Did she really care?" The friend told you I did and I was hurting too. You responded with, "I know, but she didn't even try and I wanted her to. I don't want to be her friend anymore cause of the guilt I have for what I did hurts me, and she doesn't deserve a friend who crushes her hopes." Then the friend tells you to hold on because memories are precious, you responded, "I know but she is like me. I see myself in her personality, and I hate what I am and who I am. I feel like I take out my hantred of myself on those that are similar to me that surround me."

What hurts me the most is why did you not tell me this? Things between us could have been better if we communicated our feelings instead of hiding them away. I know there's things I wished I told you, but feared to, but given the chance I would have. Even this letter I wish I could personally tell you but with the things that are now, I am blocked from contacting you because you said you were "done with me". I know the quotes were four years ago, but do you still feel that way?

When we split up, I let you go because I had no choice. If I tried getting you to stay with me that would not be fair to you, because you didnt' share the feelings that would have kept us together. I didnt' want to hurt you, or make you sad, so I tried letting you go and trapping my feelings inside. I was hurt, and angry because I didn't understand. I didn't understand why you didn't come to me first, and I was the last to know. I am an understanding person, and if you just came to me first to explain then I wouldn't have been so much upset. I didn't fight because I didn't want to hurt you, and I don't like fighting because it leads to sorrow. I did care, I cared so much that I often blamed myself for your anger. And if it wasn't for us breaking-up, I would never have met the love of my life, and I know you will find someone who loves you too. There is no reason for you to feel guilty for our breakup.

It hurts to know that you chose not to be my friend. Yes, you hurt me, but given enough time that hurt would heal, and I do forgive people. I was trying to forgive you, but everytime I tried talking to you it would lead us fighting over something and we would get hurt again. I don't know how to talk to you without you being angry. I kept trying to be part of your life, to be your friend because you mean something to me. You were one of my close friends that I trusted and felt safe around in high school, and I wanted that feeling back so I tried my hardest to continue being your friend. Instead you pushed me away, thrown me out of your life, and your anger grew to where you often bashed me. The past is gone, so there's no reason to hold that guilt anymore, and I just want the pain to end. I wanted my friend back.

Why do you hate yourself? In the past, what made you see yourself as a "monster"? Yes, we were so alike in high school which was one of the reasons I felt close to you. You were sweet, kind, quiet, and you understood me. Those qualities made me feel safe and that I could trust you. I miss that person so much. We all miss that person because that person was a wonderful person. What happened to that person? What made you change? Do you hate me because I remind you of your past self? There was nothing wrong with that person, and i would do anything to have that person back. But now, you changed drastically where I fear that friend I had is forever gone. You hate that person so you push me away. Is that really the reason for your anger against me?

I only want the truth, and to speak civily to each other without you pushing me away. You continue to delete me out of your life when you're angry with me, but you never tell me anything. You bash me, but never explain your feelings. We have a broken communication. I forgive you for the past, that is very old news, and I have healed. However, this week you harmed me badly by treating me the way you did. You called me awful names and told me my opinion is worthless, and even when I did apologize, you continued to attack me. You were very angry, and you deleted more people out of your life because they defended me. The person you are now scares me, and I don't know how to talk to you without fearing you will bash me. You say I "put your nose in affairs that you don't belong" and that angers you, but I only post positive and nice things to your comments because I want to make you happy, and help you through whatever darkness you face. I don't want to see you hurt so I try to be your light. I love helping my friends, and you I considered my friend. I only want to make you happy, but you treated me like I was your enemy.

I failed to make you happy, and it seems the only way both of us to be happy is for us to stay out of each other's lives. It hurts me to walk away from you, but you have made it perfectly clear you dont' want anything to do with me. And there is no way for us to mend our broken friendship after all that's happened between us. The person you have became, no, the monster you are now, won't allow us to be friends. You werent a monster in the past, but you are one now, and I am sorry to say I don't like that monster. That monster harms the people who are trying to make you happy. But, if my absence from your life makes you happy, then I guess this is really goodbye. I can't forgive that monster when the monster continues to harm others and myself. But know this, I can never hate you. No matter how much sorrow i face, I can never bring myself to fully hate you. I am always reminded of the friend I once knew, and I miss him.

I miss the old you, but that's the past now, isn't it? You've changed, and I don't know if you still remember the person you once was. I'm sorry for causing you pain in the past, and I forgave you for us splitting up. I can't forgive you now for the monster that recently harmed me, but I don't hate you. We had some good memories together, and I will cherish them. I hope you do too if you do remember. Thanks for being my friend, and I am sorry for the ways turned out between us. I know we won't be friends anymore, but I don't want to be your enemy either. I want us both to live a happy life going our seperate ways. I'm sorry I failed making you happy, but I promise to not start trouble with you, so please don't start any with me.

This is my final goodbye. I will miss you, but this is for the best for both of us. This way we both can't hurt each other anymore, and be happy.

Dogs that bite the hands that feed them eventually go hungry.

You know this has been a bad year for "friends" starting trouble and throwing me away. I knew this day would come too when the other person bashed me then deleted me from their life just like the previous person (the rant before this one). And over an argument where our opinions clashed, and I even told this person over and over that I wasn't against them. I was their friend, and was just stating my opinion, but no matter what I said I was attacked. I get called a hypocrite and that my opinion is worthless. Well this time I held my tongue and tried being nice back, but in this rant is where my sadistic side will vent. Why? because I'm hurt and angry, and sadistic side needs to stand up for nice side.

This is MY blog, and everyone is kept anonymous for privacy and safety reasons. If you think this post is about you then I ask you to prove it. If you can't then there is no reason to be angry. Also like usual the point of view may change to "you", this is the general sense and is not directed at the reader. It's easier than saying he/she all the time.

Where to start? Well let me describe this person first to make it more sense. I knew this person for years, he/she used to be such a kind person in the past but changed into someone who is rude, and it isn't the first time the person treated me this badly, he/she treats everyone with rudeness because he/she thrives on anger. I don't know why this is, but you have to walk on eggshells to keep on this person's good side, and i'm talking tip-toeing while bowing your head down in complete surrender because this person will ground your name into the dirt with harsh language, and then delete you from their life. An arguement could be anything, and you are the enemy if your opinion differs. Well, I do admit I shouldnt have told my opinion, but even when I did apologize it didnt' matter. That's how this time I got deleted was because my views didn't agree with his/hers.

First off, it does irk me when people bash religion simply because they don't believe in it. That's just as bad as religious people bashing non-believers for the same reason. Instead of blaming the religion, I focus on the people who are doing the bashing. Those are the bad ones, right? Well this is my opinion, and my "friend" loves to bash religion, and only religion. If I say it was the followers fault I get called a hypocrite because i'm "judging" like they are. blah blah, it doesn't matter what the argument was over, it was how this "friend" acted. I was nice, and civil in giving my opinion, and I continued to say that I was on this person's side. But was this "friend" the same? No, he/she damn bashed my opinion and me! Just because you don't believe in something doesn't mean you can bash the ones that do! You are worse than the religious hypocrites if you are forcing YOUR beliefs on to another regardless of what they are. You hate religion because you don't agree with the Christian bible? So you have to go out of your way cursing the religion just because some religions people did you wrong? Well guess what, you are teh same as them for bashing you. Religion to me is similar to the gun. Guns get blamed for killing people, so people hate guns. But there are good gun owners and bad gun owners, right? Same goes for religion. There are religious people who are very nice and wouldn't harm another. That's my whole argument, but I kept it simple and saying "I blame the people". I told this person over and over that I was on his/her side but no matter what I said I get damn attacked. I freaking apologized!

I even said "We can agree to disagree and I will drop this. I'm sorry if it seemed I was attacking you. I wasn't." but not even that worked because all you did was continue to insult me and bash religion. I'm an agnostic, i said this twice in the discussion. I even agreed in my very first post, but no, you just wanted to argue. You always have to be right. You have to be damn king/queen where you order people to believe what you want us to believe. And I was saying that the people that bashed you were bad, but that just got me called a hypocrite because I was "judging" them. How the hell does that make any sense? You hate religion because you are tired of people bashing you, then why stick up for the people bashing you? But that's not the problem here. It had nothing to do with religion at all, because this isn't the first time you argued with me. You argue with me over anything you don't like. You purposelly ignored me once because you knew me on Facebook so you didn't want to contact me on another social site, and then get mad at me for questioning why you ignored me. No matter what it is, you make it into an argumetn so you can damn attack me by saying how much of a horrible person I am.

All I ever was, was kind to you, trying to bring positive to your world because I truly care for my friends, but that's not good enough. It will never be good enough for someone like you. Instead my kindness is annoying to you because you say I'm a person who "jumps quickly into the middle of things you don't belong". I'm so sorry for giving a shit for my friends! I'm sorry that I wanted to help you, and make your life better! Not my fault you want to have a miserable life where you hate everything about the world. That's all you know how to do is hate. You hate this, you hate that, and i guess you do hate me too. Since my opinion is "worthless" then it's pointless to even try anymore since no matter what I say it will never be enough. You call me the "hypocrite" but it's you who's the biggest of them all. You cry and whine about no one is talking to you, but you dman ignore those who go out of their way to speak to you. You said once "if you don't want people in your buisness don't post it online", well guess what? Don't post your stuff online either! Oh and lets not forget, your opinion is sacred so you can't be wrong. You are the perfect little saint in your world and we are the mere peasants who get deleted if we step out of line.

Guess what?! I'm done with your crap, and I give up. I'm sorry, i truly am, but I tried being your friend and I am tired of walking on eggshells why you are freely bashing every single thing like you are the damn king. You're not the king, you are a sad little kid who don't know how to grow up and treat others with kindness. Kindess is a foregn language to you because you are a rude ass prick! Stop whining so much, and look at the bright side once in awhile instead of trapping yourself in your dark castle. I'm tired of being insulted for trying to brighten your day with words like "I hope you feel better!" but you ignore me. You say i'm annoying because i don't stop posting on your stuff, you say my opinion is worthless because i don't have the same view as you, and you say i'm a hypocrite because you don't like what i say. I'm not the hypocrite here. I was damn defending people like you, and trying to get you to see it's people's fault for the world we live in, but no, you have to hate religion, and you hate EVERYBODY who isnt' an atheist. You hate the damn world. But you know what, you can hate me... you can drag my name into the dirt and call me worthless, but you can never break me. I feel sorry for people like you because all you know is hatred, and you hold anger in your heart where no one will ever heal it. I never claimed to be perfect, and i know i'm no saint, but i never once insulted you (regardless of this rant), so why did you have to bash my name into the dirt? Why did you have to say my words are worthless?

I can only make up theories to why you hate me and why you treat me like i'm the plaque. My theory is you hate the world so much that if you see someone who's filled with goodness, you have to break them down until you are better. You are a bully, you see something good so you tear it down to make yourself feel superior. it's like this "Hey, she's not that perfect" so you go out of your way to insult that person to make them like everybody else, because you can't accept maybe you're the bad guy and that you are no better than the people around you. Newsflash!! You're worse because there is no honor in people who are rude and tear down others. You want to bash something so badly? Bash yourself you crybaby. That's all you know how to do is whine about your life and insult people. But I don't hate you. despite it hurts like hell knowing that you could hate me, and throw my friendship away so easily the third time (the third damn time!), but I'm done! I'm so damn done! I give up because it's no longer worth it, I failed trying to brighten your world, and all I get out of it is my friend saying my opinion is worthless and I'm a hypocrite, then deleteding me. I'm damn tired of you keep deleting me, and throwing my friendship away!

I'm sick and tired of dealing with these types of people. Why do I attract them? Why do they love to hate me so much? I refuse to bow down to people who watn to bash me. I shouldn't have to protect myself against "friends" like this, and real friends would never delete me over an argument, you can have differnet opinions and still be friends. But no, this person doesn't want to be my friend. this person hates me and thinks i'm this horrible person who is a hypocrite because i didnt' believe what he/she believed. But no matter how much I try to make sense of this, I wind up hurt and confused. I miss the old friend this person was back in high school but that person is no more. Instead this person changed into a rude asshole who is so angry with the world that everyone is the enemy. I'm the enemy, and you know what? I don't care anymore... I tried my best. I have the "patience of a saint" as a good friend told me once, and I stayed as long as I could but no more.

Once you exit my life you better stay out of it. You deleted me so you are going to stay deleted. You wanted me out of your life then so be it. Stay the fuck out of my life because i'm tired of getting bit by the dog that i'm trying to help. Stupid dog, you will wind up alone because you can't stop biting the people that are trying to help you and be your friend. But no...wind up alone in your lonely damn cage cause i'm fucking done! just stay out of my life and don't come crawling back. I promise this time I won't take you back no matter how much you damn whimper. This wolf is not loyal to those who are not loyal to me, and if you attack me again you will meet my fangs. In the meantime, say Hi again to Karma for me! You will be meeting it soon just like the last time you were a jerk.

Ok, rant over and sadistic side is caged now.

Once you burn the bridge you better get out of my life.

This is going to be a full-out rant so be warned about the language and rage within this blog. Agian this is MY blog so I can post whatever I want, and i don't care if you get offended or not, simply because if you don't have a guilty conscisous then you have nothing to be angry over. If you are angry then you are guilty of something, and prove to me how this blog is about you.

The identities within this blog are kept anonymous for privacy and safety reasons. the Point of view may change to where i'm responding to something previiously said by using 'you" which is a general use.

Where to start? Lets start with the situation itself shall we? Well, I currently lost a friend last night because this person blew up over something stupid again where he/she plays the poor victim where us bad guys are torturing. So like in the past this so-called friend called me and my fiance out, and spreading lies about us. Then when confronted giving my side, I get cussed out with all names under the sun such as "egotisctical bitch" "whore" "stupid self-centered childish whore!" "annoying" "damn busy body" "self-centered spoiled brat attitude", I've been condemned to hell, and that I should die because I'm a "waste of oxygen". Lovely, isn't it? that's not even everything that this person said. I am not proud of what I said back but I did NOT call this person any of those things back, all I called this person was a "hypocritical liar" and stuff like that. I didn't cuss at this person, but I bet this person will lie about it since he/she is already saying I'm spreading rumors due to a "friend" of ours this person talked to but the person can't prove what person it was. What caused this hatred? Because this friend is a drama queen/king that loves to play the victim over anything they hate hearing about themselves. All my fiance and I told him/her is that we are tired of his/her negative attitude where he/she ALWAYS is complaining about horrible their life is, or telling some made-up story that everyone knows is a lie just to get attention. It's pathetic and immature for a person to act this way, but I'm glad this person is gone, why? I don't have to deal with them anymore. I'm tired of being the whipping girl where some whack-job baits me, bullies me, and tries making me their inferiror little pet they use to feel good about themselves. I don't give a shit anymore. If you don't care for me then I won't care for you. I'm done!

I am not that weak girl anymore, hell call me whatever you want but know that I will always be better. Why? Because for one I'm the nicest, caring and kindest person you will ever meet and I put others before myself. I am loyal to the core and take your problems into myself. So what makes anyone think their insults will damage me? Go ask anyone who knows me and they'll tell you who's the good one and who's the whining lair. Comdemn me to hell? Everyone knows I dont' belong there. Unlike you I'm not telling people to go die just because I'm angry at something so stupid. I never once told anyone to die or go to hell, unlike you I'm not obsessed with hatred in my heart. Whore? A whore is a person who slept with many different people, and I'm engaged to one man who's my one and only. Therefore I'm not a whore. egotistic? Egotistic is a person who things only of themselves (aka self centered) and everyone knows I'm the most carying person, so again another failed attempt. Immature/childish? I'm not the one throwing a tantrum. Busy body? Sorry for being interesting in my friends' life, it's what friends do. They communicate with each other and care for what's happening in each other's life. Sorry that you don't want anyone caring for you. Annoying and clingy? Prove it. Go die? That's a nice thing to say, isn't it? My oxgyen actually helps the people around me unlike yours who tears them down. Also if you don't want anyone in your damn buisness then keep it offline!

I do find it funny that another person is angry with my fiance and I because the previous person is giving them a hard time just like everyone else. IF you are going to get mad then get mad at the person yelling at you! It's common sense. And when isn't this person not pissed off? If you have known them as long as you did then you would know the person is drama-centeral and gets mad at every bitsy thing they find offense regardless of what it is. So either get over it or stand the fuck up for yourself! Stop beign a pansy and put the person into their place already! The person only does this because you let them! And again if you don't want people posting on your comments because it's "personal" then don't damn post it online! If it's for everyone to see then it's not private and no longer yoru personal buisness. Dont' post it if you don't want people posting about it. And sorry for damn caring about my friends! I post because I care and genuienly concerned, but hell I'll stop if you want to be a jerk about it. Jeez, and it was this same person who always told others to keep personal stuff offline. Hypocrite much? IT seems I'm surrounding by these types of people because they are so immature and self-centered they only see their pain than anothers.

Newsflash! The world doesn't care about how every single feeling you have when you act like rude pricks. Don't tell someone to grow up when you are acting like a child. Only hypocrites push their charactistics on to another. Everyone is their mirror and they are the saints of this world that can do no wrong. But you know what? Time will put them into their place when they bark up the wrong tree, and they will. They can't help themselves. They love misery and drama is their main dish. But you know what? I'm through with these people ebcause they are nothing to me anymore. I'm not friends with those who aren't loyal to me. Either you are my friend, or get out of my life. And if you are my enemy then prepare to meet my fangs and put into your damn place when karma kicks your ass. And Karma will come for you because those who do wrong things get what they deserve in the end. those who are erased from my life will never come crawling back because I destroyed the bridge. You had your damn chance and you blew it so stay the fuck out of my life. I don't take back those who disrepect me, my friends, and my family (fiance is family).

Also I have a good life compared to those jerks. And since high school my life has gotten better. I am in college, have a loving fiance, and we are moving forward in our life. So what "shit" did I expect to be coming? The only shit I saw coming was a friend blowing up like usual with a serious mental problem. Call me whatever, but in the end we all know who's the real idiot here. The new me don't take crap, and will be honest. I will always be kind, that will never change because I believe kindness is most imporrtant, but I'm not your whipping girl either. Go get a new hobby, every last one of you who has a problem with me. Because I don't have time wasting my life dealing with children throwing tantrums. Take your own advice and stop being hypocrites. No one likes a hypocritical immature liar.Also if you don't grow up soon  you will end up alone with no one to blame but yourselves. I stopped giving a shit about the lives of those who don't care for me. They're not worth my time.

Rant ended for now. Again if you complain about this being about anyone particular, give me proof and keep your guilty conscious to yourself. This is my blog and I keep everything anonymous, there are no names named.

Sensitivity vs. "tough skin"

All my life I have been sensitive where words really hurt me, and after 22 (my age) that seems to not change. The only thing I have changed is masking my tears and hiding the pain where others can not view it, why? Because all my life people hated upon me for my sensitivity, and the other day in an disagreement that led to a bad argument (over something trivial) a person told me I should "leave my emotions at the door" and be "thick-skinned" just because I got angry with him when he insulted me by his "truth" in what supposed to be a simple disagreement over opinions.

As always what I say in MY blog is my opinions and my thoughts about others. If you don't like it then too damn bad, go somewhere else to read. I'm sorry but people like to argue with me and don't know when to shut up when I say I want to stop arguing.

First off, what's wrong with being sensitive? Why is it such a taboo to people that they believe we are weak just because we get hurt easily? Sensitive people are only human and we do live upon our emotions. Without emotions all you are is a cold person who don't know how to feel, and in order to understand someone you must try feeling what they feel. Put yourself in others shoes first to feel and to think logically. The sensitive people have the biggest hearts because we care so much about others we will rarely bring you down, but those who don't care for emotions are very quick to harm another believing their words are "true".

Secondly, you can think logically and have emotions too. Emotions equal passion about something making you determined to stand up for you beliefs, and the logic helps you overcome you obstances regardless of the argument at hand. I will never "leave my emotions at the door" simply because I refuse to be cold towards another and give up on what I believe when I still disagree. When I disagree it doesn't mean I refuse to believe you simply because "i don't want to", no, it means I just don't agree with what you are saying, and if you call me names because of it like "being blind to the core" then you just proved you are an arrogant asshole. People can agree to disagree, and that has nothing to do with emotions, it simply means accepting that each person disagrees and move on with something else. but if you damn continue arguing then that proves your emotions are taking control since you can't accept someone thinks differently than you. So who's the emotional one now?

Thirdly, don't damn ever compare yourself to me when I state a problem such as "i been bullied" because despite that you been bullied too, does not mean you know what i went through. I got bullied because I was sensitive and "weak", and i seriously doubt you know how that feels by simply saying "i was bullied too but i learned to deal with it" bullshit! No one should ever learn to "deal with it" because bullying is wrong! Bashing is wrong! And no one is allowed to bash immaturly then bash another person for disagreeing with them! Yes, I am sensitive where words harm me but I'm also mature enough to hold my temper where I speak kindly and want to end the argument which you seem to not want to stop. Your "tough-skin" has clouded your judgement as a human being where you have to insult someone just to prove your point. that's really immature and you, sir, are an asshole.

I am sick and damn tired of people hammering on me just because I'm not "tough-skinned" enough to handle things that upset me. That is just who I am, I was born this way and i'll probably always be this way. But that gives you no right to insult me over it. I tried changing so many times, to stop caring and lock up these harmful emotions, but I keep failing cause I keep crying. I hate crying because others put in my mind that I am weak because of it, so I beat myself up even more trying not to damn cry! It's stressful and frustrating! Why must I change to please you? Why can't people just accept me as me? I have became so confused to what I should do that I am broken inside.

And I can't simply "ignore" an argument that strikes me because it's in my nature to always defend/protect when someone insults me any way. But I can only take so much were I get upset and flusttered where I cannot defend myself well, and what's worse is I'm all alone in these battles because others wish me to simply "ignore it" "learn from it" or they don't show up in time to help me. Then I get depressed for being sensitive where I cannot simply defend myself, and the help that I need i get refused. am I really that pathetic? I really do wish I could lock my emotions away sometimes so people will stop harming me so much...but I fear that will never happen and i'm stuck being hurt all the time and no one can help me. No one can help because there is no way they can.

I'm a sensitive person. Either accept it or please leave me the fuck alone... I am already broken from others, what else you going to do to me?

All Furries are people, but not all people are furries.

Before I begin this rant I first would like to say I don’t really consider myself a Furry even though I could fit into the category since my RPC has wolf characteristics (such as ears and tail) but isn’t full-body like majority of them. I have nothing against Furries and I'm friends with some. Even some of my close friends consider themselves furries. This rant isn’t about the furries in general, but about how some people have taken it too far where it seems it has became their reality where the world itself has been forgotten.

As always I do not give out names for safety and privacy. Everything is anonymous.

Some furries take their role-play way too seriously where reality doesn’t exist to them. For example to what I mean, lets say two different animal furries such as a canine and a herbivore become friends, but the herbivore is offended by the canine furry because he/she is a canine, so either the canine furry change their fursona (their furry Role-play character personality) or they lose a friend. How stupid is that? Why can’t they be friends? Why is the herbivore offended/uncomfortable by the other furry’s canine fursona? Is he/she afraid the canine will eat their fursona? If so then that’s the stupidest thing ever. It’s role-play for lord’s sake! Not real, and you should never judge on someone’s outer appearance (or fursona in this case). Anyone can be friends no matter who you are, so why care about the different animal fursonas? It really is annoying when I see furries act badly towards others just because of a particular fursona. It makes you as a person in reality a bad person. It’s not real so it gives you no right to judge people like that, and it’s really annoying.

Another thing is some furries stereotype other furries just by what fursona they take on. Like for example, someone meets several of the same type of animal fursona so the person automatically believes every fursona of that animal is the same. Let’s say a lion since that’s the one I hear complained about the most. A person meets several lion fursonas and the person dislikes the lions’ personalities due to their "prideful" nature so the person automatically believes every lion he/she meets will act this way. Yes, the idea with furries is to act like the animal you are pretending to be, but why must you automatically stereotype every particular animal a certain why just because a few of those furries did you wrong? That’s like saying every gothic person is morbid and hates the world. It’s freakin’s stereotyping and wrong to do. Don’t blame a category just because you have bad luck with certain types of people. Just like in reality with normal stereotypes, not all groups of indiviuals will act the same way. I have met some up-beat and happy gothic people, and I have a friend who’s fursona is a lioness who’s far from being "prideful".

One thing that really does irk me is when someone talks about a person who isn’t a furry as a "non-furry" when the conversation has nothing to do with being a furry. Why couldn’t you just say a "person" or "someone"? Why must you make it sound like it’s a bad thing to not be a furry? This is what I mean when I say when people lose reality in their role-play world. Yes, it’s fine to live in your fantasy but you shouldn’t forget about reality and the people that live within it. This is also stereotyping people and makes me get the impression you are treating them like outcasts just because they aren’t a "furry". They are still a person just like you regardless of what role-play they do, or if they even do role-play. It’s fine when you are role-playing or the conversation has to do with furries to say "non-furry" but why would you call someone that when you are talking about something that has nothing to do with those subjects? Also the same goes for complaining about how "furries" act when the complaint has nothing to do with role-play, but normal reality matters such as relationships. For examples for both, lets say someone (that is a furry) is annoyed with someone who’s not a furry because that person comments about the person’s (who’s a furry) personality in reality. Then that person complains to his/her friends saying something like "A non-furry just got offended by my personality". See what I mean? Even though the situation had NOTHING to do with being a furry, the person automatically has to talk about furries and refers to others as "non-furries". The other example is like this, a person (the furry) has friends who are also furries that tend to get into relationships too much either for their role-play or even for reality. The person complains about this referring them to "furries" than "people" even though people (no matter who/what you are) act badly in relationships. When talking about something that isn’t furry-related why must you always consider people as either furries or non-furries? It’s annoying because you are labeling people.

My main deal with those who are furries is when they lose themselves in their role-play and forget their living in the real world. There are people out there who may not share your interests but that doesn’t mean you can write them off as "non-furries" and treat them differently like outcasts or something. The Furry-world (you could call it) is all that they see or care about, and everything else is just a passing blur. They have to act in a specific way even if it means they act differently than they normally would to fit this "animal", or maybe even start labeling people by their chosen animal than the person themselves. It reminds me of high school in the movies with all those school labels. If you don’t fit in their "group" you are an outcast, and if you are a certain animal you are already judged before you are met just because that particular animal was used by a person who had a bad attitude. I don’t care about the constant role-play, or bringing fantasy to reality, but it’s when you lose reality and start acting like jerks is when it becomes unbearable.

There is a huge difference in bringing fantasy (role-play) to reality and having fantasy take over your reality. The first one is a balance that states you love being able to fly but you know when to touch your feet back to the ground when the time comes. The second staying up in the air going higher as you dismiss all of reality. You need a balance like the first one, because if you dismiss reality then there is no way you will survive in this world successfully. It’s fine to live in the Furry-world but you wouldn’t try to bite your boss just because he said something you didn’t like, would you? If that’s a yes then you need help. If it’s a no, then why do you treat others by your furry-world rules? My whole point is don’t lose reality and stop damn labeling people! Furry or not, people are still people regardless and you should never treat them badly or differently just because you labeled them as something. Not all lions will act like a jerk by being "prideful", you don’t have to act in a certain stereotype just cause your animal is stereotyped that way (not all wolves are going to bite your head off. Some are even docile), and defiantly don’t say "non-furries" like the person is an outcast just because they don’t share the same interest as you, and defiantly don’t call them that when the whole situation has nothing to do with furries! It annoys me when someone constantly talks about "furries" even if the conversation/complaint/situation has nothing to do with furries in the first place.

Furries are all people, but not all people are furries. Respect each other regardless, and don’t lose yourself in your fantasy when you live in reality. Find a balance. I am sorry if this offends those who claim to be furries but it has to be said and if it does offend you then maybe you need to actually listen to what I’m saying and try to change things regarding furries. Again this is not about all furries, but just some that I have noticed. I’m not bashing them, I’m just pointing out things I find annoying. A reminder this is my blog so I’m free to post what I want despite other people’s opinions.